


Mother of Invention

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-02-05
Updated: 2007-02-05
Packaged: 2019-05-15 11:31:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14789696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: CJ has phone sex





	Mother of Invention

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

Mother of Invention

CJ/Danny, Jed, Abbey, mentions of others

NC-17

Through end of series

Not mine, never were, never will be, but they consume my soul

Feedback and criticism always welcomed

\------------------------------------------------------

_December 18, 2007 Santa Monica, CA and Chicago, IL_

The phone rang in the Santa Monica house about 6:10 PM. Picking up, Danny saw that it was CJ’s cell number.

“How’s the most beautiful point four mom in the world?” he asked.

“As frustrated as everyone else in this purgatory on earth known as O’Hare International Airport,” CJ replied. “The storm is over and they’ve reopened the runways, but getting on a plane is another story. I’m on standby for everything tonight and the 6:00 AM tomorrow. I was able to get a confirmed seat on the 8:00 AM.”

She had flown up to Chicago last night on the “red eye”, leaving Los Angeles at 11:30 and arriving in Chicago early that morning. She was at the University (and in Chicago, there is only one university) to set up the group that would plan the routes into the African interior. The group would include geologists, engineers, anthropologists, and political experts. She explained to them that “Road to a Better World” was not looking to build American-style superhighways, nor was the project interested in a Cairo-to-Capetown, Monrovia-to-Mogadishu type network. The physical nature of the continent, plus the large number of not always friendly with each other countries, discouraged such a plan. Instead, they would branch out from the major ports and cities into the less developed parts of the area; riverways of concrete, not water. Once the group was established, they would do their research and make their recommendations without any real oversight on her part.

“Listen, why don’t you skip the standby hassle and take a room for the night? I know you said you were able to sleep on the plane last night, but it’s been a long day for you, Apollo, and Diana. And getting from gate to gate can’t be much fun.” He coughed on the last sentence.

“So it’s one of each today?” she kidded. “Are you sure you wouldn’t mind? It would be nice to get out of these clothes. Of course, I don’t have anything to change into.”

“So you stop in one of the sports shops and buy a 2XL shirt,” he told her. “Hang up with me, get a room, and call me back.” He coughed some more.

“Okay. You don’t sound good.”

“I’ll live. You get a bed for the three of you. Love you.”

“Me, too.”

She called back about 10 minutes later. “The Hilton right here in the airport had a vacancy,” she reported, “so I’m taking it. It’s hideously expensive, but they have twenty-four hour room service and I’m worth it. Or at least I hope Frank thinks so.”

He started coughing again. “Okay, go buy your shirt, check in, get something to eat and call me.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Don’t worry about me. Scoot.”

The phone rang and woke up Danny. As soon as he picked up, he started into a sneezing fit.

“That doesn’t sound good.”

“I guess maybe I picked up something last week in the Sierras.” They had gone up to gold country and explored around for a few days. On the way back, outside of Mariposa, Danny spotted a “cut your own” Christmas tree farm and they stopped, picked out a Frazier fur, and brought it back with them. “The ones in the lots were probably cut around Veterans’ Day,” he said. The tree was in its stand in the living room, but they were waiting until she returned to decorate, so except for the Christmas nail that Tim had given them, there was nothing on it. “So, I hope that it was a Notre Dame shirt that you bought.”

“In your dreams. It says ‘Bears’, even if it is navy and orange instead of navy and gold. And, yes, I took a shower; yes, I had a decent meal – baked chicken, baked potato, green beans, and 1 percent milk; yes, I’ve arranged for my wakeup call; and, yes, I am settled in bed with my feet propped up, and after we hang up, I will go right to sleep and not read all the fascinating andexciting stuff I have about concrete versus macadam surfaces, gravel underlays, and road sealants. What’s up at home?”

“Not much. Hank and Steve invited us to their Christmas party next week. Frank and Diana Munoz” he named the family two houses on the other side “are hosting a posada tonight, asked me over, but I think I’ll try to sleep off this cold that’s coming on. Oh, Abbey called. Annie, excuse me, Anne Westin will be in her first musical at UCLA after the break, she wants us to go and take pictures, maybe videos for them. Abbey said it was one of your favorites. How come I don’t know about your passion for Best Little Whorehouse in Texas?”

CJ groaned. “She’s never going to let me live that down. I guess I didn’t tell you. It was the morning of the Inauguration and we were gathered to watch Abbey and the President” for CJ, there would only be one president“leave for the last time. Ed and Larry-“

“Why am I afraid of anything that involves you, Ed, and Larry?” he muttered.

“Shush – asked to me settle a bet they had for the past seven years. Ed said I had a tattoo, Larry said no. They wanted to know who got the steak dinner.”

“Please tell me that you didn’t strip to prove that your beautiful body has never been touched by a needle, except for shots.”

“I told them I didn’t have a tattoo, then started singing:

‘Brands belong on cattle, and that ain’t what we’re selling at Miss Mona’s’ ,

not realizing who was right behind me. I don’t know who was redder, me or Helen Santos.”

“No wonder it was such an ugly vase. But we were invited to the gala in San Francisco in February, so she’s probably not holding a grudge.”

“Danny, if we go to that, I’d need to buy something to wear and maternity evening wear is ridiculously expensive.”

“That’s okay, I want you to look sexy and attractive, but in a very refined way.”

“You did have to mention that word, didn’t you?” she groaned.

“Bad tonight, babe?” For the past couple weeks, his wife’s libido was periodically going off the charts.

“Yeah.” Deep sigh. “It’s hard to explain, but it actually hurts--“.

“You want to know how many times I hurt after those kisses we shared over the Bartlet administration?”

“So now you’re laughing at me?”

“No, Jeannie,” he said softly. Then he joked, “I guess the shower head is fixed and not on a hose.”

“Yep and nope.”

“And a fancy-schmancy place like that doesn’t have a self-serve laundry.”

“How do you know about that?”

“I watch ‘Scrubs’. And you don’t have a bathing suit, so the jacuzzi is out.”

“Danny!” she squealed.

“Well, you know what they say about necessity. You’ve got about eight of these little trips over the next few months, don’t you? I think I better add a little battery powered something to my stocking stuffer list for you.”

“I don’t believe you!” she exclaimed. Then, softer, more serious, “Danny, you wouldn’t mind if I – “

“I mind that I’m not always around to take care of your needs, but if I can’t – “

“I don’t know if it would help if it wasn’t you, if only like the football game – “

They both fell silent, remembering what happened a couple of weeks ago.

Danny was watching the Army-Navy game in the dining room turned bedroom. For once, it was an exciting game, the outcome still up in the air with 10 minutes left in the fourth quarter. CJ came into the room.

“How was the walk?” he asked, his eyes remaining on the screen.

“Okay,” she answered. “Danny, how much longer will the game be?”

“Maybe 25-30 minutes.”

“Oh.”

The woebegone tone in her voice caused him to look up and one look at her face told him what the problem was.

He muted the television, turned on the closed captioning.

“Come here.” Opening his legs, he pulled her down into the Vee, her back toward him, and lifted her shift up to her waist. Putting his left arm across her upper arms, he reached into her panties with his right.

She moved a little in protest. “Danny, I can wait.”

He kissed the side of her neck. “But you don’t have to. Close your eyes and let me do this for you.”

And while Army and Navy each scored a touchdown and a field goal, Danny took care of the tension that was built up in his pregnant wife. Luckily, the gods of love won out over the gods of war, and Navy won on a last minute field goal, so there was no overtime. The network showed a jubilant Matt Santos with Josh Lyman sitting behind him. And CJ felt a lot better. Then Danny turned off the television and after another ten minutes, both of them felt even better.

“CJ?” Danny’s voice brought her back to the present. “Put your phone on speaker and put it beside you on the bed.” Softly, but with authority. “Now get yourself real comfortable and put your hand where you want mine to be.”

“Danny, I don’t know if I – “.

“Sweetheart, I would never make you do anything you don’t want to do and if you don’t want to, it’s your call. But, I also don’t want you worrying about how much a dress is going to cost and I don’t want Ed and Larry talking about your body and most of all, I don’t want you hurting. I’d like to take care of you, but my hands and my mouth can’t reach to Chicago, so I’m asking you to help me take care of you.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to do all the things you like, all the things you taught me to do.”

“What about the things I didn’t know I liked until you did them to me?”

“Them too.”

She put the phone on speaker and did as he asked. He told her how much he loved her, he told her about her eyes and her lips and her navel. He told her about the way she glowed when the afternoon sun came in through their bedroom window and how she glistened when it was moonlight’s turn. Her told her how much he liked being in the circle of her arms and the circle of her legs.

And when he heard the little sigh that he had come to know meant that while he hadn’t taken her to the sun, the moon, and the stars, he had taken her to the top of the lighthouse by the pier, he told her again that he loved her.

She picked up the phone. “Danny, did we just have phone sex?”

“Yeah, I guess we did. Or at least you did.”

“Are you hurting now?”

“Not really. Maybe I am getting sick,” he laughed.

“It was nice. I prefer the real thing, mind you, but it was nice.” She yawned out loud.

“Necessity, again,” he added. “Now tell me your flight info for tomorrow so I can meet you and then you get some sleep.”

“Danny, just this once, couldn’t I take a cab? You’re getting sick and –“.

“CJ, it’s non-“.

“Negotiable,” she completed his sentence and sighed. “I think it’s about 10:15 our time. Four hours’ flight time less two hours’ time change. I’ll call from the plane.”

“Good night, sweetheart. Love you.”

“Love you back,” she said.

She got out her phone charger and plugged it in. She started for the bathroom to wash her hands and then changed her mind, got back into bed.

They usually fell asleep in the classic “spoon” position and sometimes they would find themselves awakening together in the middle of the night. She would shift her upper leg to give him access and he would kiss the back of her neck and slide into her. They would move slowly together, as if the children inside her were already born and sleeping in the same room and they did not want to disturb the babies. He would use his hand on her and between that hand, the fullness inside her, and the teasing of his testicles as they gently slapped against her fanny, she would usually experience a very intense, yet very quiet orgasm. He would kiss her neck again, and pull her back against him, his arm around her. Secure in the warmth of his body against her back and the protection of his arm around her, she would kiss the hand that had made her feel so good, and fall asleep again to the odor of her body on that hand. Maybe tonight, if she closed her eyes and tried really hard, she could pretend that it was Danny’s hand from which the odor emanated.

She thought about the last part of their conversation.

It was back in early April, when she and Franklin Hollis were working out details. Danny told him that he didn’t want CJ in cabs or on buses, that sort of thing. When she flew into places, he wanted her met by bonded and certified limousine drivers. To her surprise, Frank Hollis was in total agreement and said he had the same arrangements for his wife when she traveled for his other foundations.

Then Danny told her that, for the most part, he would be taking her to and from the LA airports. He would walk with her to the security checkpoint; he would wait in the airport until her flight took off from the runway. On return flights, he would meet her in baggage claim. If the trip began and ended during “normal business daylight hours” and was short enough that she could park in the lot, she could drive herself. If the return on such a flight was late, after those "normal business daylight hours",she was to let him know in what lot she was parked. He would come to the airport and park in the same lot. He would meet her in baggage claim and they would walk to her car. She would drive him to his car and they would leave the lot together. He would follow her home.

It was their first big fight, if you can call a situation where only one person argued a fight. He never once raised his voice. He never spoke angrily. He never sighed or exhaled through his nose. He never called her “Claudia Jean”.

But every time she thought she made a valid point, every time she stopped to take a breath, he very calmly repeated the same three words, “CJ, it’s non-negotiable”.

He helped with the cooking; he helped with the cleaning. He was more conscientious with the laundry than she was, separating for both the washer and the dryer according to the labels. He didn’t tell her what kind of toilet paper to buy (“as long as it’s two-ply and soft”); he let her do the budget and handle the money (“you’re the child of the math teacher”). He accepted without question her judgment about the house they bought and how it could be made to work for them. He did all the “guy” things efficiently and competently. He took care of her car. He did all the “gentlemanly” stuff, but he did not do them condescendingly. He had given her a wonderful vacation in San Diego. He had given her a very special wedding night under trying circumstances. He had given her the honeymoon of her dreams. There were times when she was in danger of letting her emotions get the best of her and he reined her in, but he never did it meanly and he never embarrassed her in front of others. He was the perfect twenty-first century fiancé and husband.

And with regard to this one aspect of her life, he expected total, unquestioning obedience from her.

She thought back to winter, when she and Danny went to New Hampshire to visit with the Bartlets. There was one afternoon when she was alone with Abbey. They were walking in the snow toward a creek that would eventually run into the Merrimack.

“Abbey, what do you do when they become overprotective?”

“In what sense? I’ve seen the way Danny acts around you. He looks out for you, but he doesn’t treat you as if you were made out of spun sugar. Does it bother you?”

“No, I like it. You know, once I told Simon that I liked him being tall because it made me feel feminine; with Danny I feel not only feminine but cherished and I revel in it. No, it’s the way I feel he sometimes wants to shield me from the real world, from the things I’ve dealt with all my adult life.”

“Sometimes you kiss them, tell them that you love them, but that in this particular situation, you can take care of yourself. Once in a while, you tell them you can take care of yourself, but skip the kissing and telling them you love them part. And once in a while, you thank God that there is someone who wants to take care of things for you. The tricky part is knowing when to do what.”

“Yeah, I wonder if I’m wanting it to be that last one more than I should. So you just get all Ephesians with it and submit?”

“I wish that Paul had chosen whatever Greek word best translates to 'deferential' because that’s what I think he really meant. Submissive sounds abasive and self-effacing. Deferential implies more dignity, more choice, more self-respect on the part of the one doing the deferring. It implies ‘My views are just as important, just as valid, but I’m accepting your views in this situation.’ But then I didn’t major in Linguistics,” the former First Lady laughed.

“Abbey, have you ever thought, what it would have been like, married to a good man like your husband or my Danny” she smiled at the thought “back in the middle ages when all you had to do was keep him fed and clothed and happy in bed, have a kid every other year? To defer, as you put it, to him on everything else? To not have to deal with the money or earning a living? To let him handle all of it?”

“CJ, those books that Carol and Margaret gave you must have really done a number on you. I’m sure that a lot of those women worried about the money and the crops and were in a panic because they felt there was nothing they could do about it. Not to mention the constant worry about your man getting run through with a sword and definitely not to mention dying from giving birth to one of those kids every other year. I’m sure that although, in the end, they deferred, they made their views known; and I’m sure that a lot of those ‘good men’ were smart enough to recognize the wisdom that came from the minds and the mouths of their wives and did some deferring themselves.”

So Claudia Cregg Concannon, 99 parts liberated and 1 part deferential, turned over and went to sleep.

Danny got up and took some Tylenol. He was beginning to feel as if a ten-ton semi trailer had driven over each of his joints – elbows, shoulders, knees. His throat was sore and the light bothered his eyes. He could hear the sounds of the posada songs being sung up the street and wished he felt well enough to join the group and the party afterward, but he had to feel better so he could pick up CJ tomorrow.

He remembered their time in New Hampshire with the Bartlets. Late in the afternoon of the second full day, he was in the kitchen with the former President, while CJ and Abbey were out walking. Two days ago, he and CJ arrived at the farm, and that afternoon, the four of them talked together. Yesterday morning, he and CJ talked with just Abbey, and then in the early afternoon, they talked with Jed by himself. Later that afternoon, he talked with the first couple while CJ visited with Liz. This morning, he caught up with Zoey while CJ talked with the Bartlets. Earlier this afternoon, he met with Abbey while CJ met with Jed. In addition to talking about the female psyche, she had gone into some detail about the female body and how the two interact; for the life of him, he couldn’t imagine the man sitting across from him having the same sort of discussion with the woman he considered his fourth daughter. With all the different combinations, many topics related to marriage and making it work were covered.

He got up to pour himself another cup of coffee, offering the pot to the other man, who shook his head no.

“Mr. President, your wife is a very strong, very dedicated, very intelligent, and very emotional woman.”

“Stipulated.”

“My Jeannie, my CJ” he smiled at the thought “is also a very strong, very dedicated – “.

“She worked for me for over eight years, Danny. Again, stipulated.”

“You get an immense pleasure, a sense of pride, just sitting by and watching them throw down on the big stage, but you don’t want them to get hurt. There’s this fundamental need to protect, but you have to resist a lot of the time, at least in this day and age. But sometimes, you feel as if you need to draw a line, insist. How do you know if and when?”

“Danny, when you find out, please let me know,” the older man laughed. “Seriously, it’s easier to know when not as opposed to when to. Apart from the obvious stuff – never on money, never on her friends, unless there’s a criminal or a sadist in the bunch, never on the stereotypical remote, those kinds of things – it’s got to be something about, and for her. It’s got to be something important to you, but not about you. Except that she is everything to you and if it’s about her, it is in some way about you because without her, you aren’t anymore.”

Danny wasn’t sure why he felt the way he did about her safety getting to and from airports. It wasn’t one of his strange premonitions. All he knew is that he felt better knowing that she would not be walking into parking lots in the dark and that she would not be in cabs with random drivers.

After he had finally convinced her that she couldn’t change his mind, she had sighed, smiled, and kissed his cheek. “You really are very sweet,” she laughed. He pulled her into his arms, kissed her hair, and whispered “If anything ever happened to you…”.

Taking one more sip of water from the bottle on the nightstand, he fell into a fevered sleep.

_December 19, 2007_

The plane was about 40 minutes away from touchdown at LAX. CJ had tried to reach Danny three times at home and three times on his cell, with no answers. More than a bit worried, she pulled out her phone book and called Hank and Steve. When Steve answered, she explained the situation, told him where the spare key was hidden, and asked him to check. She would call the house again in 5-10 minutes.

Apparently her husband had a very nice case of the flu and slept through all the calls. Steve didn’t think he was in any danger, but he was definitely feverish, weak, and in not condition to get out of bed, let alone drive to the airport.

“CJ, he asked me to meet you. What airline, what flight, and when?”

“Steve, I can get a cab, you don’t have to go to that trouble.”

“CJ, he also said to tell you it was –“

“Non-negotiable,” she sighed. “Actually, it might be good, we can stop at the market on the way.” She gave him the details, hung up, and reached for her phone book again. Air-Fone was sure going to make a lot off her today.

“Erin, it’s CJ.” Pause. “I’m okay, on my way home from Chicago, but Danny has the flu. When you were sick as kids, did you mom give you ginger ale, Seven-Up, or Sprite?” She wrote down ginger ale. “Fizzy or flat?” Fizzy. “Chicken broth, chicken noodle, or chicken rice?” Rice. “Anything else?” Buttered white toast with the crusts cut off. Scrambled eggs with hot dog circles. Baked potatoes. Lemon Jell-O. Cheracol-D. Vicks Vapo-Rub.

“Thanks, Erin, I’ll call tomorrow and let you know how he’s doing.”

One more call to her ob/gyn’s office. The nurse told her that the babies should be okay as long as she washed her hands after touching Danny and anything he touched. Bleach would be a good disinfectant. To be on the safe side, she might consider latex gloves.

When she arrived home, Steve put the groceries away while she went to check on Danny. He was definitely running a fever; the sheets were clammy. He needed a shower, clean clothes.

She thought a bit, then went to the garage and got one of the white resin chairs they kept for when they had extra company. She put it in the shower and got out a fresh set of sheets. With Steve’s help, she got him to the bathroom, got him undressed (and smiled when the other man closed his eyes) and in the chair. Steve volunteered to change the bed and she stripped down to her underwear and used the shower massage unit to bathe her husband. She managed to get a toothbrush into his mouth. She dried him as best she could, getting him to lean forward so she could dry his back and get a T-shirt on him. Steve told her he would be in the living room when she needed his help again, so she changed into a dry bra and underpants, put on a shift and then the two of them got Danny back into bed. He was asleep before his proverbial head hit the proverbial pillow.

She and Steve talked for a bit. He mentioned the party next week and she said that Danny had told her about it.

“But did he tell you that it was a costume party?” he asked.

“A costume party at Christmas?”

“It’s a hoot. Come as an elf, come as an angel. Last year, nine guys came as candlesticks strung together with bungee cords. They said they were a menorah. Maybe you could come as a dreidel,” he joked.

“Or Danny could be the angel and I could be the tree that is stuck up ..”.

At that point, the man left, telling her to be sure to call on them if she needed any more help.

She prepared the Jell-O and put it in the refrigerator to set. She put some soup on to heat when it was ready, turned the burner down to simmer. Then she went to the bedroom and taking the throw from the loveseat, carefully lay down on top of the covers. Hank and Steve were good neighbors and were becoming good friends. Later she would talk with Danny, see how he felt about giving them keys to the house, the cars, just in case. She looked around. The contractors had finished up two weeks ago and were now building the other “C” extension that would turn the house into a flattened “A”. She could just see into the little room that was painted light yellow with a baby-themed wallpaper border and paper below the chair rail. After the first of the year, they would start to buy cribs and other furniture.

Later, after he woke up and she gave him ginger ale and chicken soup, she sat on the bed with his head against the side of her expanding stomach. His arm was across her belly and she was playing with his hair.

“Thank you for being so good about the airport stuff.” He mumbled into her skin. “It’s not an ego trip, CJ, I do worry - “.

“I know,” she said softly, “and on this issue, I subm, I defer to your wishes. Just don’t start expecting it on anything and everything.”

“Wouldn’t dare dream of it. And thanks for getting me cleaned up. I feel so much better. That was really smart about using the chair.”

“Well, you know what they say about necessity.” And she continued to play with his hair and he fell asleep again.  
\---------------------------------------

 

From “A Lil Ole Bitty Pissant Country Place” by Carol Hall

And please don't show us no tattoos  
No hearts and flowers on your thigh

(spoken “It's downright tacky”)

Brandsbelong oncattle and that ain't what we're selling at Miss Mona's

(spoken “Do you catch my drift?”)


End file.
